escape

i am knee deep in shallow escape land
we all need that now and then, right?
we deserve it?
yes i do
yes we do here we go
fantasy land
tra la la la

oh yeah

Funny, I almost forgot to mention this. I got the job. Yay.

Long

It's been a long time since I've posted, although some people go for months, or forget entirely that they even have a blog. I don't have much to post about, but I thought I'd sit here and try. I always think of a great idea I could go on about when I'm away from the computer, at work, or in my car. Then I get home and sit here and stare at the screen, my mind going blank. It's why I've said before that I need something to respond to. It's a sad state of affairs. I need a question to answer. This is why I have writer's block. I'm too passive. What's the cure for that, anyway? Anyone know?

Look alive people!

I know there are at least four people who occasionally look at my blog, but only half of you have ever posted. GET WITH IT! LOOK ALIVE!!!!!!!!!! Say something for crying out loud. I'm talking to YOU, Silent Eagle. I'm talking to YOU, Chris. I need attention! I am needy! AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[big letters, c'mon!]My neck hurts[/big letters, c'mon!]

And so does my back. I feel like this prod is pushing on my spine, and some muscles are spasming. It's not as bad as it sounds, really, just a combination of sleep depravation and too many video games. If I roll my head around a little it isn't that bad. The door just opened and closed in the other room. I hear a dog running through the living room. I wonder if the goat is happy right now. Max has been having the runs a lot lately. I think maybe he needs more veggies? Anyone know what gives cats the runs? It stunk when I got home today, but our houseguest/temporary roomate cleaned it up already. We have vanquished most of the ants from our house with this sweet smelling poison that they take back to the nest. I want to collect micronauts again. I'd like to have a huge city of them, but I don't have the room for that kind of extravagance. Roll the neck around.... better. I wonder if it is time to play Worms again... no, he's still on the phone. His ex is a horrible person, at least for the moment. I have newtype posters in my computer room. I love creating music. Possibly more than listening to it. Argh... creaky squeaky door! Houseguest got a cool car for only $900. I helped a bit. We were going to buy a trailor for him to live in, but he got a car instead. Probably just as well. Someday we will have a hot tub. That'll be so nice. My wife needs one to soak away her stress. There are too many unclean bowls in this room. I should take them to the kitchen. We put in granite counters back in August. I still haven't finished the grouting. It's a hassle. One day, I swear. My jaw just popped. That's irritating. Crap. I need dental work, on top of everything else. They'd better give me that job!!!

funny blog

This blog here has some funny stuff on it. Go see!

Suspect

I number all the misconceived and callous ways of ones who never know the way it hurts to be a different day in which we fall and lose some grace and choose our weight in tales of loving long and low in rememberance of the undertow that pulls our body close to gods who look upon the waves and nod so knowingly that one must guess that deep inside they do not bless as much as they would think they could if they were not so understood by none who talk of they and them but look instead to clues and signs and truths and lies and dealings fair and contracts which dare to tell the undersigned to cut their hair in the face of what may be the last stand of reality which we have managed thus far to avoid in favor of our mirrored way.

Goodnight but not Goodbye

In the bleary hours of morning I walk the streets and gaze into pools of oil in the skyline, obscuring the stars and clouds. I was once a paper thin excuse for a being. But now I am moldy and ruined, coughing up the last of my spore-ridden lungs. Nothing can bring me back to that moment, and I will write many poems about how I missed my chance. She is not dead yet, but someone is, and I will be so too. So will you. But in this trite observation, I see my nihlism vanish like the fog turns to dew... still there, but transformed into something that feeds life, no longer obscuring my vision. I will die someday, and I will feed life, and I will know whether we are in a Dickian illusion at last. Buddha saves me, but only because Jesus and Thor are too tired... they've carried too many corpses. I'll be the last, but not because of anything I've earned. I just refuse to leave anyone behind. I'll be waiting for you all. Love is a long road, sure, but eternity is longer.