Old Farts

After watching a few training videos in which people talk about how people in this country don't respect old people, I have to vent this somewhere. While I love my 92 year old grandmother, and I respect her for many things, I must say that the words "last one in the car is a nigger baby" have never passed through my lips. She can not say the same. Yet if you utter the word "fuck" in her range of hearing, which is sadly short these days, she is mortally offended.

I feel it is high time that old farts started taking responsibility for their contribution to the generation gap.

How many times have you heard the "uphill both ways in the snow barefoot" story in earnest! I say TOO MANY!!

How many times have you heard "kids these days don't know what an honest day's work is" while in line at Taco Bell from some old woman complaining to the clearly exhausted minimum- wage- earning teenager about getting too many onions on her burrito? TOO MANY TO COUNT!!

How many times have you heard "turn that crap down, you call that music, it's just noise" from a drunken gramp who can't really hear the music for what it is because he went to too many big band concerts when he was young and danced too near the trumpet section? BEYOND INFINITY!!

How many road must a young man walk down, before he's allowed to be free of the complaints and harrassments and cultural intolerance of old farts? I ALREADY USED BEEYOND INFINITY!!!!!!

I was going to build this up to a soul stirring climax calling for the eradication of all old farts via the Eskimo technique, but I love my grandma.